I'm writing twice today, weird, I know, I never do this, but I just saw something that pinched a nerve all the way down my spine and emm,
People, defend the things, people, and words that you believe in against all odds, especially against those who try to temper with the things each of us hold as sacred in our hearts, we all have a different definition of sacred, so whatever is sacred to you, don't let people touch it with dirty hands.

Montreal...start getting ready! :) :) ;)

finally things are changing

I like Dido, I think that if I were to write a song, I'd write what she has already written, therefore I'll leave it up to her, but, those songs of hers are like the pieces of a puzzle to my current thoughts.

when you know, you know, and if you don't know, you've never known, period.
I had a revelation the other day, crazy I know, but I totally did and I love these moments because it's when I realize that for being human and a smart human that is, it is amazing that I don't see the things that are right in front of me and how absurd it is not to notice but then again, I have read 3 books in the past 2 months, so I feel smarter, I'd like to think these books have helped my mind be more active and... thoughtful???
Also, being born on February 19th creates a problem, I dream too much. I could spend endless hours dreaming of the 'almost- perfect life' (at this point in my life, I don't believe in the perfect anything, maybe later on I will, it creates another internal dilemma and I would go ahead and explain it but ehh...I don't feel like it today.) anyway, I forget the difference between reality and dreaming. I think I need to create a balance of reality and dreaming, I don't think dreaming is a bad thing, but, man kind has not yet found a formula to stopping time and before you know it, a lifetime could have gone by in dreaming instead of taking action to make those dreams come true. I think so far, my only problem with dreaming, is that other people, don't dare to dream as much, or even dream at all! And so, I'm forced to turn and start dreaming somewhere else.
What it ALL comes down to in the end is... do you ever feel like you are being looked after by someone, or something (whatever you may believe in) but like there is someone watching your every step so that you don't fall and if you do, so that you analyze why you fell and learn the lesson? I do.

i'm watching tv

I'm watching this show which is like an american idol but in Mexico, and the students have to live in a house all together and take dance, singing, acting, blah blah classes and then every sunday, the students sing their assigned songs and they get critiques and blah blah, its another reality show, but its sooo fun! I'd like to say it's like a guilty pleasure but it totally is not, It sucks you in! We seriously set apart the evening to watch it and won't go to sleep until 11.30 when it ends.
It's like you get to learn about the "students" and its great great!
...back to watching!

One more thing

I add to my To Do list:
visit Morroco and learn as much as possible about their culture and life style and people and everything everything, it looks like such an enchanting fun colorful place, so different from what I'm used to seeing. I think that's why I want to go, because its so different from what I've seen.
I also want to go to India. I used to not be so attracted to that part of the world, but now I think India is a must.
Um... I know I had some things that I wanted to write about today, but they don't really flow into each other, or make sense together, not that that's ever stopped me before, but I guess they each deserve their own space, so maybe I'll write about them, maybe I won't, I guess I still have to decide.
I'll write about reggeaton though, for those of you who don't who I dare assume are not many, its music with a fusion of rap, salsa, reggea music, its very latino music, in fact in puerto rico its been alive for ever and ever. Now though, its becoming so so popular around the world that many artist are using it in their own music. Its a very very fun, seductive, rhytmic type of music. I think its great that its becoming so popular and that so many artists are being influenced by it. Isn't it funny who much influence lations have over the world, with their culture and yet most are condoned to the worst of life styles? what's up with that?
reminder to myself: buy a new pair of sun glasses, oh, and I like freckles.

this thing got a hemi!

I just got to drive a Durango, pretty red, soooo much fun!
then i ate empanadas and an orange
I pray for all the people who are sick and especially those who are sick and find themselves alone or away from their loved ones.

My new found passion

I've been meaning to write about this for days now because it has truly become very important in my life and for some reason or another I have neglected to do so. I want to share it with all you who read this because it is my intention that it will impact some of you and motivate you. I am absolutely passionate about yoga. For the past 2 1/2 weeks I have been going to yoga classes everyday without fail and the more I go the more I fall in love with it. Now, I will not attempt to teach you about yoga, because well that would be silly, but there are lots of misleading interpretations about what yoga really is. You will say, 2 weeks, that's nothing, but it has truly changed my life forever. I think its very true, the hard part is getting people to go and join in a yoga practice, the easy part is getting them to come back. Yoga in itself means, unifying. It is a very free NON-religious practice that allows a person to unify themselves with whatever they are lacking, unify with a God of their choosing, unifiy body and mind, unify sould and body, anything anything. This is achieved through the continous practice of excersises, breathing and a healthy positive mind. I will say that it is challenging, the biggest drive to continue practicing yoga is motivation, dedication and a want to see more of something in this world; love, joy, equality, peace, etc. It is not only healthy for the body because you learn to stretch and find your limits, it is incredibly spiritual, I strongly believe in the spiritual sense of things...life, so yoga was immediatly attractive to me. It allows a person to rid of negative thoughts and feelings through its practice, it allows a person to release tension and open their heart, it brings such a big sense of connection between the mind and the body that you begin to understand how your body works, how it is made up, how it moves and how far it can move. Finally it allows for a different perception in thinking, to see things in a different light is not always easy, yoga, emphasizes that a simple smile can change the way our mind percieves (SP?) a situation. I absolutely adooore it, I am addicted to it, and I have a crush on one of the teachers, he's only taught my class twice though, I still think he is really good looking...but anyway, that's not why I go, I seriously encourage everyone to go out and find a Yoga Studio, find some information about yoga, don't be afraid of it, EVERY SINGLE PERSON of any age that does not have a health problem, can do it and learn and be guided through some sort of yoga practice. Thinking that you can't do positions should not limit you, I guarantee that after your first class you will notice the change and be intrigued by how much you can learn.
I seriously plan my life around my yoga practice so that I don't have to miss a day of class and it has helped greatly physically, mentally and spiritually.
Go out, practice yoga!, be a happier healthier you!!!

long day for a long post

So indeed, when you stop fighting it, when you stop looking for it, it comes to you, in this case, I kept looking for things to live for, for things to think about, and when I gave up, it all came to me.
I took my mom to the doctor's today, which I pray, was a pointless visit, because I want her to be healthy, I want her to be happy, ever since we came back from Mexico, I see her not taking care of herself, happy because my sister and I are home, and happy with my dad, but not genuinely happy. Today for some reason she started a conversation about divorce, which she assures us is not happening and will not happen, but this issue has been present my whole entire life, I have heard the threat of divorce soooo many times that I am imune to it. I discovered something today though, my mom, has had so many fights and arguments with my father and my sister and me, asking to be understood. She especially wishes for my sister and her to understand her situation, which we always believe to be dramatized, that her life has really not been that unhappy. The truth is however, that she is not arguing because she has an unhappy life, she is arguing because she feels alone, not understood and heart broken. And, yes, she always says, when you are older, you will understand, the truth is though, that age does not bring wisdom in itself, its the experiences that we live as we get older, how can someone understand something they have never heard or seen? how can someone understand if they have never been exposed to certain things? it's impossible, Today, I understood her like never before, because now I know what heart break is, now I know what she has been asking for her entire life, simply to find someone to say, I understand you, I believe you and I will protect you and shelter you. I saw all this in 5 seconds, I suddenly understood 20 years, in 5 seconds.
Then, after lunch, my sister told me that my aunt, the one I have been praying for, is losing her battle, that the cancer seized to exist in her brain to unforgivingly spread through her womb and possibly vital organs, and all I can do is keep on asking, why her? and wish for a miracle. More than anything, I want her to be healthy, she is such a fighter, she wants to stay here and care for her daughters and husband, I want God to keep her here, and if he doesn't, then I want him to give her the best place in heaven so that she can care for her loved ones from there.
Finally, I went to the grocery store, which by the way, I think is a chain owned by the mafia, but this little kid, 5 years old, was helping his mom as she picked corn and cleaned it, he was holding the bag for her, very excitedly which makes me assume that he really likes corn, and he turned around and looked at me and smiled, the biggest most precious smile ever, like people don't take the time to smile at each other like that, and he sooo willingly and happily, gave me the greatest gift I have received today, he smiled at me.
My favorite artist is still Alejandro Sanz.

why pride and prejudice is such a great movie

Simply because every girl wishes for a Mr. Darcy to protect her, care for her and love her unconditionally.
All the fabulous dresses, houses and country scenery is a plus.

eleven

Number Eleven possesses the qualities of intuition, patience, honesty, sensitivity, and spirituality, and is idealistic. Others turn to people who are 'Eleven' for teaching and inspiration, and are usually uplifted by the experience.

In systems such as Astrology and basic Numerology, eleven is considered to be a Master Number. Eleven can also represent sin; transgression and peril, incompleteness. Ten being the perfect number, eleven represents the exceeding of both. It is interesting to note that eleven when broken down ( 1+1=2) comprises the Two of duality. Number eleven is a master vibration and as such should not be reduced to a single number.People with this number could be both idealistic and visionary, and they are attracted to the unknown.They can be both unusual, interesting and magnetic personalities.

Eleven bring the gift of spiritual inheritance, is gifted as the "Light-Bearer". It is the number of the Light within all. Strengthened by the love of Peace, gentleness, sensitivity and insight. Greatest facility is the awareness of Universal relationship. Is related to the energy of Oppositions and the Balancing needed in order to achieve synthesis. Eleven is The PeaceMaker... Colours : Gold, Salmon, Prune, White and Black. Segment of the horoscope ruling friendships, hopes, desires, social relations.

11:11 - Eleven-Eleven

11:11 is said to be a pre-encoded trigger placed in our cellular memory banks prior to our descent into matter which when activated, signifies that our time of completion and ascension is near. It is believed that one knows when this particular gateway opens for them by continually seeing the numbers 11:11 in there every day lives as a continuous ocurrence. Activation of other gateways may be symbolized by other digits.
(greatdreams.com)

Eleven - If ten is ordinal perfection, then eleven is perfect organization plus one more, one extra. One more than required, an extra measure, something more than only what is required. Eleven is the number of revelation.
(spiritcommunity.com)

Hmmmm???? I think I get it :)

everybody wants to be a cat

You know, sometimes there are songs that we don't hear in months or years and then suddenly the come on the radio one day and I go, oh! i remember that song, I like that song!
so here is one of those songs, maybe you'll like it too

I waited 'til I saw the sun
I don't know why I didn't come
I left you by the house of fun
I don't know why I didn't come
I don't know why I didn't come
When I saw the break of day
I wished that I could fly away
Instead of kneeling in the sand
Catching teardrops in my hand
My heart is drenched in wine
But you'll be on my mind
Forever
Out across the endless sea
I would die in ecstasy
But I'll be a bag of bones
Driving down the road along
My heart is drenched in wine
But you'll be on my mind
Forever
Something has to make you run
I don't know why I didn't come
I feel as empty as a drum
I don't know why I didn't come
I don't know why I didn't come
I don't know why I didn't come
~ Norah Jones

I keep seeing the number 11 everywhere, I'm sure it's a sign of something, but I don't know what...

boys are jerks

you say you care about me but you only hurt me

french bread

So today, my sister and I were sent to do grocery shopping because, this is very weird but both of my parents woke up feeling sick today, my mom felt low blood pressure and my dad felt high low pressure, tell me if that is not funny? It is kind of ironic in a way because they swear to life that they are sooo so different from each other and that if they needed to they would be independent and it wouldnt matter they wouldnt miss each other, but its not true, they depend on each other so so so much, they even get sick on the same day... my dad just asked me if cognac lowers blood pressure...
Anyway, so my sister and I went to the grocery store and got our veggies, our fruits, our bread, our drinks blah blah blah and on our way out, putting all the things in our car, this woman walks by making her way to the store with her, no more than 10 years of age, daughter, who was wearing a bikini top, a skirt that might as well have been a thick belt and wedges (platform shoes) with sparkles on them...ten years old!!!! this is how they begin and then their moms wonder why they come in one day at the age of 16 and tell them that they are pregnant!!! How can a respectable mother, let her daughter who probably can't decide yet between a barbie doll or a stuffed animal for a gift, be dressed like that! going to a grocery store!
I don't know if the rest of the world agrees with me, but I am hoping that most of the world does, every new generation seems like a disgrace to mankind, like, we are suppose to be bettering the future and with what we have learned, we are supposed to be stop the new generations from making the same mistakes, but, the other day on one of my bike rides ( I go out for bike rides every day now, its like my favorite, except for the scratches on my legs, I saw a kid riding like a motorized scooter thingy, instead of a bike! he was 8 years old! parents get your kids bikes and get them moving!
...my parents are arguing over which way seems better to cook the bunny that comes to eat the flowers on our backyard... they won't actually cook it don't worry.

There are times when it is hard to be a girl
but oh how I loooove my hair long, it been a while since it's been this long, i missed it.

Target!

OMG! I don't ever really OMG! about anything, but OMG Target! What a great store, It's the greatest store that could ever be built, really, whoever came up with the concept of Target, Wow! I want to meet this person. It is so much fun to go in there and look around and it's the kind of store where you feel proud for finding things on sale and you don't feel guilty about buying them, seriously, from the dollar spot to toothpaste, I could spend endless hours at Target and keep on finding awesome stuff. My favorite part is the design and quality stuff that you find there, you can find decently priced unique stuff and it's the best! So it goes like this,
Favorite things to do:
buy shoes
go to Target!

I also like to eat vanilla conchas...mmmm yumm conchas.

Lord, show us your kindness

How is it that hundreds and hundreds of people can gather together at one place, looking for him, looking to praise him and devote their actions to him? It must be because there is something there, theere is something to believe in. Beyond the institution and the people who resist the rules and laws imposed by it, beyond the book, the stories and the teachings, it is more than sensible to believe that there is someone there to have faith in, if so many people follow him faithfully, then he must really be there, to comfort and to heal and to assure that the life he gave us has a purpose.

It is My need to rid of the resentment I feel, simply to better My own life.

how lucky I am!

To be Latina! and if you dont have a latino background you probably will not understand this, probably never can understand it, but if you are latino, you know what I'm talking about and if you are especially proud of it, I applaud you because there is nothing more beautiful, rich, happy and passionate than our culture, I wish the entire world could embrace it because then, it would be such a happy place, I adore and nurture myself in the culture I have been raised in, and hold on to it with such devotion, I could not have asked for anything more than to be born in Mexico and understand what it's all about
:) Big happy smile, for our music, for the way we think and feel, for our food, for our language, for our families and for our drive to live like there is no tomorrow!

the problem with the way some people talk

Some people say what they think others want to hear, what they think is the right thing to say, yet, they never actually stop to think about what it is they really want to say, they can never say what comes from their heart and because of this so little sounds like its true. The bigger problem is that they probably don't say what comes from their heart because they haven't found their heart.
Sometimes people's biggest fear is to turn out to be like the person they least want to be like, the fear sometimes becomes a reality for some people.
14 is my fucking lucky number
I think I want nothing but to laugh, laugh whole heartedly, it is my biggest wish for the rest of today.

I woke up...

singing:
Hey! Little Girl
Comb your hair, fix your makeup
Soon he will open the door
Don't think because there's a ring on your finger
You needn't try anymore
For wives should always be lovers too
Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you
I'm warning you...
Day after day
There are girls at the office
And men will always be men
Don't send him off with your hair still in curlers
You may not see him again
For wives should always be lovers too
Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you
He's almost here...
Hey! Little girl
Better wear something pretty
Something you'd wear to go to the city and
Dim all the lights, pour the wine, start the music
Time to get ready for love
Time to get ready
Time to get ready for love

I havent been able to find the song though, at least the version I want (first wives club) its a good song, makes me happy.
then i looked at the tiffany's web site for an hour, my sister got a tiffany's necklace from her boyfriend, bc he missed her when we were in Mexico so he went out to buy her a tiffany's necklace, im working on convincing him to buy me one.
I went out to buy baby's clothes, my mom wanted a little something because the lady that gives her manicure/pedicure is having a baby, so she sent me out to buy some stuff, baby's stuff is sooo cute, all of it!
It's sooo hot outside, I want my pool back.

the problem with phone calls

I truly do not understand why there is a need for tele-marketers. It is not as if we don't buy enough things already or spend enough money on things, to go and have people call us and waste our precious time. Yesterday afternoon, my house recieved a phone call and we have caller I.D. so it's easy for us to identify which calls are important and which are not. Anyway, I answered the phone because the call appeared as a private caller and it was a man who is running a survey about latinos and technology...!!!! I have a problem with all this.
First of all, if you are going to work as a telemarketer or someone running surveys on the phone or whatever where you strictly rely on your voice, learn to articulate, take a speech class.
Second, I was on the phone for 30 minutes, answering really stupid questions, why? to whose benefit? 30 minutes!!!! I could have baked a cake, taken a nap, gone for a run (haha), something more useful!!! 30 freaking minutes! on something I was not even interested in.
Last, be polite, we are doing you a favor, I was polite enough not to hang up on this man because it is a decent job, its better than selling gum at every street light, but still, c'mon, be nice. I am sure that just like I don't like your job, you don't like your job, but if you are going to do it, be the best at it.
One more thing, that survey insulted me, the kind of questions were like, how smart are you because you are a latino and what kind of life style can a latino have, it was a waste of time, and why does this interest people??? that's what i would like to know.

today

I went to church and i asked for faith, for a lot of faith, and that above anything else there is faith, for everybody, not just me.
Then I came home and ate shrimp and drank cocktails (my dad insisted), they were yummy, like jelly beans with a kick of grand marnier, and watched the world cup finally which really the last 40 min. where worth watching, oh! plus Shakira performing. I thought Italy undoubtedly deserved the title between the two teams ( I still wanted Brazil to be the team to win, but..) Especially after the sad display from the french capitan Zidane of violence, which after, reflects on the entire team. I honestly believe that after he hit Materazzi (oh Materazzi!!) the Italian team should have recieved the cup right there. He completely ignored what the game was about, he caused a loss for his team and made his team and his country look bad.
Yay for Italy!!! I think I shall have pizza or pasta for dinner to celebrate!

friday adventures

The day began with an early morning shower, not that early, but early enough so that after choosing to wear a blue summer skirt and eating a banana I was out the door by 10.30 am. I was my mom's companion to one of her many famous lunches she has with her friends at very expensive restaurants. We picked up a friend who is like the crazy aunt that I never had, and off we went. Today's restaurant was a Tuscan grill and it was delicious. I had lemon lift tea and that alone made my day happy. Then I had a lot of bread because I just could not get enough of it, it was sooo good. I then had a yummy salad with chicken and roasted vegetalbles, the plate was a weird shape and kind of small so it was hard to eat but I appreciate their attempt at being different. Also, I had to pick out the red bell peppers out, because I do not like red bell peppers, I can eat the green and yellow ones but not the red. So, they should really ask you, what kind of peppers would you like with that?
Mature women conversations are funny, its great to be a part of them, I see myself doing the same thing in the future, well in the far future. We moved on to the crabtree and evelyn store where my mother is a prestigious customer and so we got millions and millions of discounts, so ended up buying lots of goodies, which I do not regret. We then walked across the sky walk and into a shoe store but nothing was pleasing so we moved on to Sephora. My mom is looking for this perfum that we now know has been discontinued; no longer being sold. I was looking at different kinds of mascara and this lady came up to me and she was like, you're looking for the perfect mascara? and to be nice I said yes, so she gave me this whole demonstration on mascaras and told me she had THE perfect mascara. She was one of those people that talks really fast, doesn't even let you answer everything she asks you and she put mascara on me, and she was like you already have eye lashes the size of milwaukee (what does that mean, is milwaukee that big????) anyway, i've never seen my eyelashes look soo long and curly so I bought it.
After that we walked to a department store, still looking for the perfum but the mom's insisted that I try on pants and shirts from the sale racks so I did. This man at the register, who we really thought was a woman, but not it turned out to be a man, looked at me and my mom like we couldn't possibly afford the clothes we ended up buying, the nerve!
We then walked across the mall to another department store, still looking for the perfume, and then my mom and and my crazy aunt tried on clothes and bought some stuff, where by the way an 80 year old lady dressed all in white, had an entire hallway to walk through, yet she decided to push me out of the way and yell, EXCUSE ME, I really felt no tenderness for that bitter old woman, im sure she has no grand children. We then bought some cosmetics after we were convinced there was no perfume, and then we walked all the way back to our car, and drove crazy aunt home. My mom and I then went to the most delicious bakery I know Oakland or Macomb county and bought lots of tarts, muffins and brownies, yuuum!
thats it.

yesterday my dad and i went to the pharmacy and, he drives a white sport liberty, not all cars do this, but for some reason, his has a button near the front passangers seat that turns on if the weight of a person is not enough in order to activate the emergency bag thing in case of an...emergency. That damn button turns on everytime I get on that car, so basically, I'm not allowed to sit in the front, so!
Plan A:
get yourself a trainer and train everyday to build up muscle because muscle weighs more than fat and it's healthier to have more muscle than...not.
Plan B:
Plan A will never happen because I thoroughly enjoy not working out soooo, I will run downstairs on our treadmill 3 or 4 times a week, take some more dance classes and with a good balanced diet try to gain some healthy weight.

ps. I skipped the shoes, I also bought shoes, well my mom bought them for me. today was fun.

the truth about beds

They are always much more comfortable after you get up, have breakfast and come back to it. They are so much more welcoming after three days of not being made and they are eeven better when they are big. During winter flannel sheets are a must, during summer, egyptian cotton. And the cherry on top are the big fluffy pillows, a good amount of them but at least two.
Last night I had a dream that I wrote this: enough is enough, there are other things to look forward to, I will not fight the useless fight or struggle.
So I guess I will write it down... I just did.
I'm reading this book, it's about love, and one of the reasons I like it so much is because of how descriptive it is, it is as if the reader becomes part of the plot, you can picture absolutely everything. It's about a girl who is incredibly beautiful, elegant, delicate but not weak, and one of her prospects watches her as she walks through town, he is mesmerized by the way she walks, by her smile, he finds her gestures so intriguing and cute for lack of a better word. To him, she stands out from the rest of the crowd, and every part of her face, her hands, her steps, he watches her to memorize all of this about her. He is so utterly in love that he could watch her endlessly and imagine what his life with her would be like, How hard he would work for her, how he would admire her more and more everyday and how he would show her that she was above everything else, he calls her a goddess. I could read this part of the book over and over and over again.

I don't want

today, don't give me today. It feels endless.

things are changing

over at 49325 ecp in shelby township! It is looking gorgeous and I'm so proud of the change, I can't get enough of it, it just looks warm and nice, sometimes changes are good. I looove furniture stores, I could live in a furniture store if it were allowed, you could seriously walk in and look around, ask a little, try a little, EAT a lot!!! and walk out with no compromise, that's how great they are. It's so fun to have little projects to do around my house, I feel useful and I feel like we bonded, yes the house and me.
my new favorite foods are chicken & green tomato sauce empanadas and shrimp, not necessarily together, but why not, I could eat these two foods all day, everyday.

Sometimes my biggest fear is to think that I will turn out to be like my mother, it's terrible really, she is a great person and talented and interesting but I fear that she has passed on to me her not so good qualities. Why is that? why must a person always fear to turn out like the people that are closest to them. This is just a thought, it's not actually that important but sometimes it ocurrs to me.
The truth however, is that I have enjoyed spending time with my mommy and daddy so so much lately, I feel like I haven't been able to laugh in a loong time and they make me laugh.
That is what I wish for today, to laugh endlessly, to laugh so much and so hard that it can take all the pain away, all of it.
I can't decide which is worse, obsession or withdrawal.

thank God for busy days

yesterday was such a busy day and oh how I enjoyed it. I wish for everyday to be like yesterday. I have a new found idea of what I want. I had a long conversation with a friend and I can't get over the fact of how much you can get from the people you least expect things from.
My sister got me a big yellow bow the other day, because she bought me oreos so she put a big yellow bow on them and I still have it and I love looking at it, its like a huge bundle of joy. i really should find out the meaning of the color yellow, like red signifies passion, white purity...purple faith, what does yellow signify?

do you still remember?

Up for you, I'd give it all
Cause when I'm thinking of you
When I'm flying above the world
How I wish I was drowning in you
I must admit that I'm oh so in love you know
Please don't ever let me go.

who would have known?

Out of all the people I know, out of all the people that could keep me in balance or hold me so I don't fall or even rock a little, my daddy is the one, he is taking care of me. I think he thinks that he can do things for me that can seem to go unnoticed or that can seem like he can do them without them seeming like its because he is worried about me, but I notice and I am oh so thankful. He is looking out for me, and he is making sure I don't break, :)
I meant to write about this two nights ago, I went to see the Lake House, well I went to the movies with the intention of seeing The Devil wears Prada but it was sold out, so I saw the Lake House and what a grrrreeaat movie! seriously if you are in the mood for a good quality, thoughtful, heart-felt movie, go see it. It may not have the best best acting, but the story, the script, the scenery, the work put into good quality camera work and layout of the story, is remarkable, it just is a great work of art. it is absolutley inspiring and smart, it's a smart movie. I suggest you get out of you chair, pick up your best friend and go to the movies right now and see it, that's how good it is.
I keep seeing yellow smily faces everywhere, its like they follow me around seriously everytime I turn, especially on cars, everybody seems to have a yellow smily face bumper sticker on their car just for me, i'm sure its a sign, but its kind of creeping me out, like... why are cars smiling at me????
Finally, I am sure many will agree with me, I strongly believe that the Soccer World Cup has been planned out as a complot against latin american countries, I don't know why, or what we did to the rest of the world but I cannot believe that not one latin american country made it to semi-finals, it is absolutely ridiculous and I demand a replay of every single game where a Latin american country played because we are better than that!
i saw fireworks friday, i saw fireworks yesterday, i will see fireworks today.

post #100

i think thats kind of cool, thought i'd point that out, 100 is a big number and its so like decisive and definite... 100, its such a merit number like I dunno, whats so worth while about 8? or 7? well seven there are 7 colors in the rainbow, 7 days in a week, 7 wonders of the world, so never mind that 7 is quite special, but, 100 is worth noting.
thoughts and thoughts, so many thoughts in my little head and all I want is to cry out, I so desperately want to cry out, not for pity or sorrow or no reason like it, for myself. I feel like I've spent an entire life supressing my wants and my feelings for others, as to not affect others, as to not make it harder for others; It's simply in my nature to put others before me. I have no problem with that I feed from that, but, right now all I want is to cry, cry myself out of tears so that I can move on to whatever is next.
One of my aunts is very very sick, she has cancer and so I prayed for her, I asked God to take everything away from me, and to give it to her, I offered everything in my life so that she could keep hers, I think he listened, I hope all that I am currently going through is because he listened.
If you've read previous entries, you might know what has me so down, if you haven't, i'm sorry, I do not wish to go into details or explain such circumstances, it never serves any good to dwell it what has happened and cannot be fixed.
All I know, and this can be applied to any hardship in life, is that life does not end here, and that every person is worth something, it is up to them to decide just how much they are worth, and no one, absolutely no one has a right to make someone question how much they are worth, I feel like I have faith again, faith in whatever comes next and I will not stop smiling, I think this is the last "sad" entry I put, well not the last last, but you know...

You know what I love about dance? It is always faithful to me, I can go back to it whenever I want and it's there for me, it's like it waits for me and I can pick it up right where I left of, and it doesn't mind. I never want to stop dancing, ever, I want it to be part of me until the day I die, so that people can say, My God, how she loved to dance.
I went to a dance classes twice this week, to keep busy, but it was so much fun, and the best part was that I was congratulated for my good rhythm and timing, yay!
I want to go see fireworks today, I saw fire works yesterday, but I want to go see fireworks today too, and then I want to go buy good night sleep tea, because I haven't been able to sleep for the past 4 nights, that's never happened to me before, I miss my sleep.