Hand in my Pocket

I'm broke but I'm happy
I'm poor but I'm kind
I'm short but I'm healthy, yeah
I'm high but I'm grounded
I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed
I'm lost but I'm hopeful baby

What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be fine fine fine
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving a high five

I feel drunk but I'm sober
I'm young and I'm underpaid
I'm tired but I'm working, yeah
I care but I'm worthless
I'm here but I'm really gone
I'm wrong and I'm sorry baby

What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be quite alright
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is flicking a cigarette

What it all comes down to
Is that I haven't got it all figured out just yet
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving the peace sign

I'm free but I'm focused
I'm green but I'm wise
I'm shy but I'm friendly baby
I'm sad but I'm laughing
I'm brave but I'm chicken shit
I'm sick but I'm pretty baby

And what it all boils down to
Is that no one's really got it figured out just yet
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is playing the piano

What it all comes down to my friends
Is that everything's just fine fine fine
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is hailing a taxicab...

~Alanis.

on being a college student

I was told that yesterday was a good day to sit down and write and lately I dont have many of those days and so I was going to write but then...I forgot. I did not know that I could become such a forgetful person but I have... thats beside the point though. I wanted to sit down and write because being a student what do we do...study right?
And so, a lot of times it feels like we simply work to get done, to turn in a paper for a good grade, but we dont take the time to enjoy what we are learning. yesterday was different, I realize that i have gone through a sort of...shift I guess is the word, I am actually enjoying the work that I do, I want to spend the time doing it and yesterday was such a great day to show me just how great things can be. I didn't even feel all the time that I spent doing or learing...that is until I sat down at around midnight and it hit me that I was exhausted, but...it is so hard to explain, it is just a great feeling, things suddenly just click.
I have been going non stop, I no longer have time to sit down and waste time, every second I have, I have to be doing something, otherwise I fall behind, but I do not mind it, I delight in it, there is just such a sense of wonder, like I know there is something great at the end of this and I can almost see it.
I havent practiced yoga in a while, which is really sad, I really need to make time for that and find a place where I can actually do it, but, my instructor spent a lot of time saying, actually feel your positive energy flowing through you, create it from within and I meditated the other day and it worked, it really really worked. you find yourself smiling without telling yourself to smile, it just happens and it was wow...i need to become a yoga instructor one day, it is on my list of things to do.
Unto a not so happy note, my grandpa was in the hospital the entire week last week and it was a lesson for all of us I think. My dad has spent the past months looking for his...birthfather? like his real dad, because the man I know as my grandpa adopted him when he was little, and he finally found him and he was thrilled to find him and know about him, and suddenly my grandpa gets sick on the verge of a heart attack and it devestated my dad but I think it put things in perspective for him. He flew down to Mexico and spend a lot a lot of time with my grandpa and to think about that makes me so happy because, that right there, is unconditional love, it is the kind of example that God puts in our lives to say...look at all the great things that I have given you, why must you go and search somewhere else. The only thing is I wish that I knew my grandpa better, I feel so distant from him and when I found out about his condition the only thing that I could think of was..I feel scared, for my dad, I dont want my dad to hurt or suffer but...nothing else. It is the type of things that you give up for this kind of life, and I have the best of both worlds but how I wish I knew him better.
During the weekend I went to visit my mom, and although I think I will be ok with them moving away, even though it is only 3 hours away, I don't think I will be. I worry about her, when we are little the world is worry free and the older we get, the more responsible we feel for people, we feel that we have to be there for them, and I don't want to not be there for my mom.

The rest is piece of cake :)

ps. one of my favorite parts of the day...smiling at strangers and having them smile back.
or when professors congratulate me
or when people tell me how great and precious and glorious I am
or when I get to relax...shower time
or when I get to spend time with a certain kid.

2007 I see you

Oh dearest, how we have drifted apart, you know, its funny how we let others influence our energy and spirit so much to the point that we stop being ourselves and we become this thing walking around that we most definitely do not want to be...I think thats why I stopped writing, it was not me writing about my everyday life, it was the things influencing me that were writing and that is not fair to my intellect, more importantly my soul and the few out there that read this.
I did want to take a few minutes of quite time that I have right now to write about the year that is leaving. 2006 was like one of those teachers in high school that you fear and feel intimidated by. They put you on the spot and they grade you really hard but at the end of the year you realize just how much they taught you and how they helped you become a better student and you realize that everything they do is not for their own pleasure but they are doing it for you. That was 2006 easily summarized. for me.
Over the past two weeks I had the opportunity to read To Kill a Mockingbird,Which is just a great awesome book, there is so much there than just words, highly recommend it. I had never read this book before, but once again things happen for a reason, and I read this book at just the right time. It was a good reflection on who I am and how I view myself (Scout and I could very well be the same person.) Growing up, especially the teen age years, it is hard to find an image of yourself, its hard to view yourself because...well its simply the time when "you are trying to find yourself"
Although, I have always had a pretty clear view of who I am, thankfully, I have never seen myself in a clearer most definite way and...I always say this, as I smile to myself, it is a wonder, discovering yourself as a human being, as a soul, it is simply amazing. I will never stop seeing myself as a child, I think like one and act like one and yet, I have so much maturity in me, and this in the humblest of ways (if that is even a word). Being almost 20 there are so many things that you slowly wake up to, situations that you have never been put in and yet its the little things that bring me the most satisfaction. For example, I now have a say in the Christmas dinner menu or the New years menu, and I cook and I arrange the house and these little responsabilites are the things that I look forward to every year, it is what brings my family closer and closer and I am so blessed to say that I have enjoyed the holidays this year with such.....i don't even know what the word is. It is simply greatness.
You know, I was once told, the world you live in Ana, is not real, you have to cut the ombilical chord, come down to Earth, and for the longest time these words hurt me so, because, I believed to be doing something wrong, I believed there was something wrong with me and I struggled with it for a while, but, now I see that I need not do such thing, this family is the glue that hold it all together and as much as we fight and yell and whatever, we love and cherish each other to death, I am closer to my dad, my mom and I are finding so many similarities btwn each other, and my sister is like my other half, and the best part is that I have great people surrounding me to show me that this is it. That I am doing nothing wrong, but still...thank you for the lesson.
I guess in the end, it is always about maintaining the soul fed and happy, if there is no soul, then there is nothing, and people you may attempt to go on without understanding this, but I promise you, you will find such happiness and comfort if you take a look inside...that is what I have learned.
2007 somehow looks promising and exciting, something about it just looks damn right...awesome.

hey now

I met you at the club that night
around was spinning records
and my heart said
hey now
hey now
hey now
hey now
yaaaow

you said you were pleased to meet me
through the sweet smell of your perfume
blew me
away now
away now
away now
away now
yaaaow

later on that week we went out,
talked under the stars until the next
day now
day now
day now
day now
yaaaow

you drank your fruitopia
and we never ran out of things to
say now
say now
say now
say now
yaaow

any minute im not with you
i hope ill see you soon
theres just something that happens
when you walk into the room

and instantly i feel so complete
it hits me right about the time you kiss my cheek
and you give me this feeling
its like no other feeling
but it knocks me off my feet

please dont ask me what i like about you
cause its every little thing you do

ummm yeah...

Breathing time

So I haven't written in fooorever which is really sad because it means that I am not even making time for myself these days. Everything is going and happening so quickly though, that I feel, there is not enough time to sit and collect my thoughts. It sort of feels like if I do, I will lose pace and rhythm and stop working and that is the last thing that I want to have happen to me right now. I however, thought it would be wise to take a deep loooong breath before releasing it and working my butt of for the next 5 days.
I feel wiser, I feel like I am learning how to deal with life and not suffer the consequences, it is a great thing to find inner strenght and power for creativity. And...it's funny how much one can learn in 4 little months, something that seems like it would take a lifetime yet, I am over coming my fears and it is such a great feeling of satisfaction, when you strive to achieve a certain goal and you reach it and it isn't pride that comes after, simply, good understanding of yourself.
The other day at one of my classes, my professor talked to us about the big scheme of things and life. Our planet is about 4.5 billion years old and from that time...human evollution has only been present for 150,000 years...that is mind-blowing. We are such a small part of something soooo big yet, think of all that we know, of all that we think and create and of all the ways we have improved our lives on this planet. We are product of something so grand and so big that even our greatest accomplishments, as great as they seem, make up a very tiny part of it all.
Situations like that, or thoughts like that really put things into perspective. Like, I have this new great and wonderful understanding of the energy I create and how I radiate it and where i spend my energy. And so, well, actually I have always known this...complicated is not fun, people bring upon themselves such martyrdom and we are all victims of this, but there is a better way to live and those who understand that...are just glorious beings.
Compassion is a hard thing to learn I think. Being able to gain a sense of compassion for others and for yourself, or the work that you do. But what it all comes down to...you are granted 100 years on this planet that has been alive for 4.5 billion change, and it may change and do whatever it wants, but it will still be there, we however, are only here for so long and so...why not create pleasant memories, why not create positive energy and kharma, why limit our flow of good energy?
It doesn't make sense does it???
my drawing professor, whom I love to death, like some girls and I say...we would take a bullet for him...he is such a wise man and today he said, mistakes are everywhere, nobody, not even the greatest artists went without making mistakes, be aware of this, you have to be serious about the work you do but in a relaxed state of being, enjoy it, laugh along the way and learn.
I think being too hard on ourselves limits us and creates fears and this too limits our flow of energy.
I can't believe that it has been like...3 weeks since I last wrote, but breaks, are good, I think this blog needed a break, there are more intersting thoughts coming along the way and I realize that writing is no longer a thing, it is simply within me. You know...people influence the way we write, like...I hope I never change the way I write or at least remember it instead of getting side tracked....whoah...so much on my my little head right now, I could go on and on and on but I will just comment on the important stuff
Parents: great good and happy with a fake christmas tree in our living room. we think it's funny, fake trees are foreign to us but it looks great, the theme this year is department stores...Macy's.
Sister: greatest sister ever, she is finding herself and her priorities in life (work, beliefs, people) and she is someone I can just have hold my hand and she paints my world in a pretty picture.
Friends: really need to get in touch with Mexico friends and Syracuse ones, I have drowned myself in other things and people and I miss these amazing lovable friends, but I know they are there and they know I am here. I love these bizarre friendships but the greatest feeling is being able to come back and even though we all have completely different lives and sometimes forget about the past...we can come back to each other and feel like we have never left mexico in 8th grade or high school in little fayetteville-manlius new york.
School: Although haha...I question sometimes what in the world it is that I am doing there and where I will end up...I love creating, I love having the responsibility to put something together. I hate calling art, its creativeness that drives me to keep going and I love improving.
Work: I FREAKING LOVE MY JOB...there no more needed to explain.
the boy: he is silly goofy and very dramatic but he makes me laugh and smile and relax and we have fun together and we listen to each other and so far so good.
ann arbor: such a great place to be, it embraces me and i adore it.
memories: keep on getting better :)
flow of energy: positive...disturbed once in a while but the important thing is to keep it flowing and not getting mad at yourself because it was disturbed, finding your way back is what matters :)

all the rest does not matter.
this is a long freaking entry.

And So

With 14 flowers
and 14 kisses
on the 14 of november
he swept me off my feet.
It is such a wonder...how this life works, how it makes things happen and how it brings new things without us expecting them...when we least realize it, our life has changed forever.
It's as if life waits for the moment to catch us off guard to surprise us with something great and that is exactly what has happened to me.
When I saw very little light, I turned and at the corner, there it was, very patiently waiting for me and its good, its peaceful giving light.
there is so much that I wish I could say, there is so much that I know people don't understand but there are times when it becomes impossible to sacrifice ourselves for others and I am happy. I am oh so happy. I have so much hope and I feel utter bliss because this boy brings light into my life. He sees in me, what I thought I had lost and things I had forgotten to see and there is something unconditional about th way he treats me, about the way he listens, about the way he smiles, about the way he talks and people tell me I look happier when I am with him. I feel happier.
I don't believe yet that I deserve all this. It all seems very new to me and like it isn't for me, almost as if destiny was confused and gave me something that infact belongs to someone else but I have hope that it isn't so and that in fact I will learn to see that I do deserve what life has put infront of me.

All I want to do is smile. c'est tout.

:)...thats me smiling 24/7.

Coffee and thoughts

For some reason I am starting to drink coffee more and more and I don't like coffee but perhaps now that is simply an act of denial. It lightens my heart though, especially mid afternoon around six, after dinner. It makes me smile.
And I feel so like...healthy recently. Besides the fact that I have this cough that will not go away and that I have no idea where it came from. I feel happy and joyous. Its so great to find peace. Its so great to find love for something, to have gratitude for things and people in our lives and to bless the days we are granted along with what they bring.
I am back in my oh so amazing ana working mode and I love it. I am truly one of those persons that finds joy in doing things, doing homework, making things, being productive. I love it and indulge in it. I think more of us need to learn that, it is soooo much better when we learn to stop complaining about all we have to do and we actually do it and enjoy doing it. It took me a while to learn that, and I am sure I will encounter maaany situations where I will not be happy with what I am doing, but I want to strive to have it be otherwise.
I had dinner at potbellys today and for the first time ever I actually finished my sandwich. I was really hungry apparently, it was delish.
I saw this huge yellow leaf, which I lie not, was the size of my head, made me wish I had a small camera so I could carry it around everyday and have it for random exciting moments such as the big leaf.
I haven't done my yoga in like...4 days and its making me sad, I really need to do it tmw. maybe a little tonite.
there is something exciting and scary and fun and great and aaahhh on the way...very soon I believe...you will all find out :)

Dear Ana

On behalf of Big Brothers Big Sisters of Washtenaw County, we are happy to inform you of your acceptance as a Big in our School Based Program. We hope you will find your experience richly rewarding. The agency is deeply appreciative of the time you have already invested in the program and promises to offer you support and assistance throughout your involvement.

:) I cannot wait to make this experience so rewarding for a little one. It is funny how the world works, it is funny how God works.
Yay!

these are the days

I absolutely adore days when I can talk to a million people and a million people talk to me and we can talk about anything. It goes to show how as humans we are so great and complex and great thinkers and just amazing. You know, growing up there is always that sense of, who am i? are the words that I am saying really my words? and it seems like we spend a lot of time (I spent a lot of time) thinking about the things I was going to say, instead of saying them, or thinking about the way i wanted to portray myself instead of portraying myself.
I feel like there are days that even though may be challenging and may test my patience are full of rewarding little incidents and somehow, I am beginning to notice those incidents. Its like my attention is shifting away from my self, my inner self, thoughts and questions, to noticing what surrounds me and giving back to the things that bring optimism and positive vibes to my life.
This is not to sound egotistical at all, in fact its otherwise, but as humans, we dont realize that we can make a difference in someone else's life. One person alone, can make the difference. It is so evident that there is that one person who genuinly just needs a little help through their day, or with a project. There is that one person who genuinly needs to talk about their life and pressures and worries. And just listening, just smiling, just saying its ok, can make the difference.
Today at my lecture series, a priest came to talk to us and it was the weirdest thing because, we usually have well known artists come who probably dont believe in religion or a spiritual life themselves. I feel like the higher being has been talking to me lately, telling me, look ana, its clearer than water, I am here for you, do not leave my side.
I have this need to live such a spiritual life that comes from within me and radiates out and he is telling me, do it through me, let me be your light.
That light is always there, in never disappoints and if it delays, wait for it, it will come- this was God talking to me through the man that spent an hour and a half sharing his wisdom with people who unfortunately are too foolish to realize that love and compassion and kindness is the only way to happiness.
Quick thoughts:
The sun came to visit Ann Arbor today and it was lovely, it doesn't get any better than sunny fall.
I can't stop eating...its crazy, my stomach has no limit, I can keep on eating forever and ever.
I am happy that I am planning out all that I have to do and I will get it done
My throat hurts like hell
ugh...some people are a bore
I love my sister
My pretty flower died, kind of sad about that.
I'm still obsessed with John Mayer.
I wore a really pretty shirt today.
It's 11.11, make a wish everyone.

Ok...emm

I love my life, I love the things going in my life right now. all of it, its like God is looking out for me, no matter what happens, he really is and I am so blessed and so thankful because of that.
I however cannot cannot accept lies
I cannot accept rude people
and as hard as I try to tell myself that it is not important I cannot accept people who do not respect limits.
Do unto others, what you want done on to you. Accept the things that are going on in your life as your own succes or your own failure...that is all there is to it.
Anyway....unto better things...
Art and I are truly finding a common ground, it is like we are genuinely becoming lifelong friends and holding each other by the hand, saying, I will be there for you no matter what.
I'm still pissed
happy thoughts, happy thoughts, happy thoughts....
perhaps a good night would be best.

sooo

Ana you look so serious, what is the matter?
It's just that im busy and I don't like feeling pressured or stress...must be the alignment of the planets or something.

After losing myself blissfully in what seems like something that could take up ALL my time...its back to me and work and studying and getting it together, because that is what I like to do, and I will not complain, I will simply say that...oh my I need to remember to breath because in the end...everything will get done. Breath it in...breath it out.

oh my

...I think my knees are still shaking...
(you can't tell but I'm smiling and I try to hide it but it isn't really working)
oh my my.

"Down to the wire
I wanted water but
I'll walk through the fire
If this is what it takes
To take me even higher
Then I'll come through
Like I do
When the world keeps
Testing me, testing me,testing me."

what you gonna do about it?

tmw will be productive as in...academically productive.

tooo dooo dooo doo

I waaaant tooo haaaave a daaance party tooonite!!!
:)
toooo doo dooo do tooo do do do.

oh snowflakes, it smells llike winter

I'm ready to write.
Hello november, welcome to my life. There is something about you, I feel like you are welcoming me with open arms so I will do the same for you. THere used to be something about you, for some reason, I couldn't get myself to like november but today, you seem different, like we are ready to meet each other. You have entered with a snow storm and although I was literally "breaded" in snow, it wasn't too bad. There is something bittersweet about the cold and about snowfalls. I almost delight in it even though the cold wind feels like needles on my face. I specially enjoy walks at night, I may be freezing, but there is something about it, it is so hard to explain, it is just safe, it means christmas is coming, it means I don't have to have a reason to hug people if I feel like it, it means being emotional is ok, You winter serve very much as a metaphor.
I wish I carried a notebook with me so I could write down little notes to remind me of all I saw in a day and all that I want to write. This blog would be a heck of a lot more interesting.
Today in drawing class, something clicked, art clicked, a calm soothing feeling clicked. whatever it was, it just brightened my oh so very loooooong day. My self-portrait is looking awesome by the way.
One of my very good friends told me a story and it made me realize that the dreams, the ideals and the beliefs that I have are not really thaaat out there or crazy. Sometimes I feel like I live in this fantasy world away from reality, not so much because I think that I am crazy but becauswe there have been people that have judged and have brought me down and decided to tell me that I need to come back to reality, yet...I am not the one wondering what to do with my life or who I am, I very well know and this story just made me smile.
Apparently, her friends parents are from Italy and they met one day on the Street, back in Italy. They never exchanged numbers or made anything of it and they seperatley decided to go to Yale. One day the man (dad) dropped something and went to pick it up and when he stood up there was this woman standing infront of him and they stared at each other and recognized each other from the day they had met and fell in love and have been married ever since (years and years.)
And then, the guy (my friends friend with the parents with the cool story) wrote her the most beautiful letter I have ever read in my life. It is the kind of letter you wish to have written about you because it talks about all the qualities that you don't see in yourself that this other person sees and its marveled by. I always wished that someone would write something like that about me, that I could inspire someone in that way, and I am not writing out of jealousy, it may sound like that, but I'm really not, I was touched and truly honestly geniunly believe that my friend deserves this in her life, she deserves that letter and she deserves this boy in her life. These are the types of things that matter in life at the end of the day. Not the gifts, the presents, not woohing someone off their feet, the simple things, being able to put in words how much someone matters to you, as simple as that, makes life worth living.
I spent an hour at a bookstore today, it was blissful me time. I bought a book about yoga because I believe that it is time I start reading about it, learning about it and its philosphy and I am so excited about it. :) It is truly something I want to commit to and dedicate to. I am one of those persons who will do something for a while and then kind of stop doing it...and let it go and never come back to it. I don't want to do that with yoga, it is too good to me.
I bought the new (kinda new) John Mayer cd, i really really like it, it is like...exactly how i feel and ever since tuesday night I feel like an older person, Like i grew up, once again...life clicked and John Mayer writes good songs about that.
"Pain throws your heart to the ground, love throws the whole thing around." So true.

Lastly, I've written about this a million times but hypocrisy and cynisism really bother me. These things really get to me and I don't understand why people behave in this way, honestly, do you not see that there are better things to do with your life? a better way to live your life? People...just don't, try to learn not to behave in this way, you ruin it for yourself and for other people.

On a lighter note...I am loving the art school and I am so afraid that this feeling will go away, I don't want it to go away, please feeling don't go away :)

oh and...its snowing like a mofo...

good day good song

No I'm not the man I used to be lately
See you met me at an interesting time
If my past is any sign of your future
You should be warned before I let you inside

Hold on to whatever you find baby
Hold on to whatever will get you through
Hold on to whatever you find baby
I don't trust myself with loving you

I will beg my way into your garden
I will break my way out when it rains
Just to get back to the place where I started
So I can watch you back all over again

Hold on to whatever you find baby
Hold on to whatever will get you through
Hold on to whatever you find baby
I don't trust myself with loving you

Who do you love?
Who do you love?
Who do you love me or the thought of me? me or the thought of me?

Hold on to whatever you find baby
Hold on to whatever will get you through
Hold on to whatever you find baby
I don't trust myself with loving you

Hold on to whatever you find baby
Hold on to whatever gets you through through
Hold on to whatever you find baby
I don't trust myself with loving you
I don't trust myself with loving you
I don't trust myself with loving you
I don't trust myself with loving you

patience

i feel like crying, like i am being held back and can't do anything about it, and i could keep on pushing, i could keep on trying to let loose, but it wouldn't do much because there is no one standing there to catch me.
meaningless. meaningless. meaningless.
It is starting to become a bore.

another grapefruitless morning

Oh when will the grapefruits be back!!! I can only wonder and hope that tmw morning when I go downstairs for breakfast I will see delicious grapefruit
Today is such a bahhh day, I don't know why recently I haven't felt the need to write, I can't seem to gather thoughts in my head that are actually interesting or worthy or writing.
Perhaps you and I blog need a break from each other. It's not you, it's me.

I no longer have love handles

I really honestly kind of miss them, it may sound really weird, but i never meant for them to disappear. Its kind of like...i lost a part of me because my love handles used to be such a part of me like ana used to = love handles. And the worst part is...i never noticed when they left me, they just kind of did. its funny how those things happen, how our bodies change with time and we dont really notice, but they do.
I haven't written in forever and there truly is sooo much that i would like to write about but its all a mess in my head, that...well it wouldn't make sense. I think what it all comes down to however, is that, life will hand you lemons and you decide what you make with them, in this case I am making lemonade. And, you know, we believe that life is some complicated scheme that is way too hard to figure out and...its really not. You just have to have a clear understanding of the things you want and the things you believe in and...life/destiny will guide you.
A lot of times we don't see the result of our actions as fast as we wish we could, and so we grow frustrated, we grow impatient and we may even stop believing, but, life has this funny way of rewarding us when we least expect it, when we stop asking for things, they just come to us. We do deserve certain things in life, its knowing how to wait for them that matters.
Even though this was suuuch a hard week to get through in some matters, it was rewarding, it was a motivating week, it was one of those weeks that if I looked back upon it months from now, I would probably cry.
I have these gorgeous flowers, that i very unexpectedly received from a very unexpected person ;) and they are gorgeous and they mean a lot to me, so thank you unexpected person. There will always be love from me to you and more than anything being able to talk to you, meant the world to me, because...you know why, it just did.
Art...yeah...theres just something about it (im nodding my head)...it makes me smile.
music too, dancing and singing makes me smile, even though i cant sing but i can definitely dance.
I just feel like giving everybody I see a big hug and telling them to smile because all good things come to us, they really do, and its a great feeling. It's delightful.

happy as a peach

Even though I only got four hours of sleep...today was a great awesome day, it was almost surreal like...do I really deserve such a good day, because its not that I dont deserve things, but I usually dont get sooooo many great things in one day and it made me happy, like...faith is important. It guides us, no matter how tense or stressful life can get, it simply guides us and I strongly believe in giving, simply giving even if I dont get credit or anything in return, giving just feeds my soul.
I love knowing that I am capable to do things, just whatever it is, if I put my mind to it, it works, it just works and I am being so much better about not stressing, about letting things work how they want to, honestly...we have no control over life or where it takes us.
I heart yoga with...all my heart, haha. I really do though, its sooo great, its so ahhh, wonderful.
Mmmmmonday, thank you for being so good to me.